Melissa Rivers on finding laughter again after mom Joan Rivers’ death: ‘Grief is a universal emotion’


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One thing that’s been constant throughout Melissa Rivers’ life is laughter. Her mother was the wise-cracking, tell-it-like-you-see-it Joan Rivers, after all.

So when the groundbreaking comedic legend died in 2014 after a botched medical procedure at the age of 81, Melissa, an only child and a mother of one, was understandably shaken by grief. She recalls her then-teenage son Cooper saying at the time, “Nothing will ever be good again.”

“And I said to him, ‘Of course things will be good again. They’ll just be different, and that doesn’t make them not good.’ I think we all lose track of that in the midst of grief,” Melissa said in a new interview with Fox News Digital.

Past viewers of “Celebrity Apprentice,” “Joan & Melissa: Joan Knows Best?” and “Fashion Police” know all too well the unbreakable bond between the pioneering comedian and her TV producer daughter. They were more than just a familiar mother-daughter duo; they were Hollywood’s tag team.

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Joan Rivers and Melissa Rivers at the 58th Annual Primetime Emmy Awards.
(Albert L. Ortega/WireImage)

Joan’s death wasn’t the first time Melissa dealt with a heartbreaking loss, though. Melissa’s father, and Joan’s husband, Edgar Rosenberg, died by suicide in the late 1980s.

“Oh, I’ve had too much grief in my life between my father’s suicide and my mother’s passing and everything in between,” Melissa says. “I think with grief, you have to acknowledge it and not try to hide it. I always say grief is a universal emotion.”

This September will mark eight years since Joan’s death, and Melissa says she’s still living by a Winston Churchill quote that essentially became her family’s “motto” when she was growing up.

“‘When you find yourself in hell, keep walking.’ That’s what you have to do when the s— hits the fan. Keep going. You’re going to get to the other side,” Melissa shares.

“The idea that I’m always going to get to the other side and that even though in the moment it may not look like everything’s going to be fine, that you’re going to be OK is definitely something I live by, and that’s something I’ve absolutely imparted to my son,” she adds.

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Melissa Rivers shares how she overcame grief following the loss of her mother, Joan Rivers. 

Melissa Rivers shares how she overcame grief following the loss of her mother, Joan Rivers. 
(Sean Black)

Aside from that, she’ll always have her humor.

“Well, it’s always been a house of laughter and humor,” the “Group Text” podcast host says of her household. “My mother always told me she thought I was a much better parent that she ever was, which is very funny yet perhaps accurate. I think I did what everybody does [when it comes to parenting], which is, you take your childhood, throw out the worst, keep the best and try to parent your child that way.”

On Tuesday, Melissa releases her fourth book, “Lies My Mother Told Me: Tall Tales from a Short Woman,” which she stresses is a work of fiction. 

“It’s really a comedy book and satire,” she says of her latest writing project.

Each chapter exposes a new “lie” Joan told Melissa throughout her life. 

“These are very silly stories where the kernel of truth is very much buried,” Melissa adds.

“I think they’re fun, and they’ll make you laugh. I think my mom would definitely be laughing.”

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Joan and Melissa Rivers, one of television's most popular mother-daughter duos, with Melissa's son, Cooper, then 12.

Joan and Melissa Rivers, one of television’s most popular mother-daughter duos, with Melissa’s son, Cooper, then 12.
(Rick Rowell/Disney General Entertainment Content via Getty Images)

In real life, the former “Fashion Police” co-host says both of her parents were “incredibly truthful.” 

“I don’t think they ever wanted me to have any delusions of what was really happening or what the world was like,” she says.

However, there was one big fib Joan once told Melissa that still baffles her today.

“I was pregnant with my son, and I was very anxious, as most first-time mothers, are about giving birth and it being hard and painful. My mother said to me, ‘Oh please, you have nothing to worry about. I had you with one shot, and I was fine.’ When I pressed a little further, eventually it turned out that one shot was a drip of a massive painkiller, so I think something got lost in translation of that story. Yeah, it was only one shot when they put the IV in!” Melissa said with a chuckle.

Joan’s iconic raspy voice and unapologetic one-liners still pop into Melissa’s head often. She also hears her mother’s past fashion advice. The rule she still lives by today?

"Lies My Mother Told Me: Tall Tales from a Short Woman" hits stands on Tuesday.

“Lies My Mother Told Me: Tall Tales from a Short Woman” hits stands on Tuesday.
(Simon & Schuster)

“It’s very general advice, which is, if you buy an expensive dress and don’t have it tailored, it’s going to look cheap. If you buy a cheap dress and have it tailored, it’s going to look expensive,” she shares.

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Television personalities Joan Rivers and Melissa Rivers on the red carpet at the 77th Annual Academy Awards at the Kodak Theater on Feb. 27, 2005 in Hollywood, California.

Television personalities Joan Rivers and Melissa Rivers on the red carpet at the 77th Annual Academy Awards at the Kodak Theater on Feb. 27, 2005 in Hollywood, California.
(Carlo Allegri/Getty Images)

Aside from her latest book, Melissa has been busy embarking on a professional journey that she says is entirely new to her: scripted television. Though it was “never part of the plan,” she’s having some fun with it. 

“I’m figuring it out as I go,” she says.

In terms of what she and Joan would be doing if the comedian were still alive today, Melissa answers matter-of-factly: “She would be working on continually giving me advice, and I would be working on still ignoring it.”



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