Jennifer Lopez’s documentary, “The Greatest Love Story Never Told,” gives fans a candid look at her relationship with Ben Affleck, including insights into why they split and how he held onto their romance while they were apart.
In the documentary, released Feb. 26, the couple also explains why they called off their wedding just three days before it was supposed to happen in 2003.
Lopez also examines her own issues with love and romance, including her feelings about her parents and childhood, leading to her search for love.
Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez get candid about their relationship in Lopez’s documentary, “The Greatest Love Story Never Told.” (John Salangsang/Variety via Getty Images)
Love letters by “Pen Affleck”
Early in the documentary, Lopez shares that her new music was inspired by a collection of handwritten love letters from Affleck, which she showed to songwriters and musicians working with her.
“This book is a book Ben gave me on our first Christmas back together. It is every letter and every email that we wrote to each other from 20 years ago and today,” she says as she flashes quick glimpses of the book.
During that time, Affleck was married to Jennifer Garner. They had three children together before splitting in 2015.
One of the highlighted pieces is a handwritten note that says, “The Greatest Love Story Never Told by Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck 2001-2010…and counting…”
Affleck revealed he was somewhat taken aback when he learned the letters were seen by others.
“I was like, ‘You’ve been showing all the musicians all these letters?’” Affleck says in the documentary. “And they were like, ‘Yeah, we call you Pen Affleck.’ And I was like, ‘Oh my God.’”
Affleck expressed in the documentary his surprise at Lopez sharing the private love letters he gave her to people as songwriting inspiration. (Rodin Eckenroth/FilmMagic)
Private vs. public relationships
Affleck’s hesitancy about the love letters being shared is just one instance of the actor struggling with his relationship being in the public eye again.
“Jen was really inspired by this experience, which is how artists do their work,” Affleck said. “They get inspired by their personal life, it moves you. I know as a writer and director I certainly do the same things. But things that are private I had always felt are sacred and special in part because they’re private.
“So, this was something of an adjustment for me.”
At a screening earlier this week for the documentary, Lopez said her husband was a “reluctant participant,” though he supported her decision to film it and, according to Lopez, was the one to say “we should be capturing this.”
In the documentary, the couple admitted they “just crumbled under the pressure” of being a tabloid phenomenon, and it put a strain on their relationship, leading them to call off their 2003 wedding three days before it was supposed to happen.
“I had a very firm sense of boundaries initially around the press, while Jen, I don’t think, objected to it the way I did. I very much did object to it,” Affleck said.
He added that he didn’t want the relationship to be on social media, but relented, saying, “We’re just two people with kind of different approaches, trying to learn to compromise.”
In the documentary, the couple admits they “crumbled under the pressure” and called their 2003 wedding off just three days before it was to happen. They later reconciled and married in 2022. (Christopher Polk/Golden Globes 2024/Golden Globes 2024 via Getty Images)
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Childhood heartbreak
In the documentary, Lopez examines her own relationship with love and relationships, beginning with her childhood.
Lopez says as the middle child of three sisters, “not the baby, not the firstborn. You just get kind of lost a little bit in between it all. That just left me on this train to show everybody that I have worth and value too.”
She says she pursued sports in high school to earn trophies and medals so people would notice.
The 54-year-old also revealed she struggled with receiving attention from her parents in her formative years.
Lopez said she “felt very ignored” by her dad, who had to work nights and slept during the day. She described her mom as “narcissist, center of attention, life of the party-type person. I got very used to being around people like that.”
Lopez, with her sister Lynda (left), father David Lopez and mother Guadalupe Lopez at Lopez’s Walk of Fame ceremony in 2013. (Jonathan Leibson/WireImage)
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Through self-reflection, she realized she pursued spending time with people like her parents but broke the pattern.
“I’m comfortable with this, but I don’t like this. I want something different, something better.”
Affleck affirms Lopez’s assessment of her childhood, saying she felt “emotionally neglected” as a child.
“The thing you discover, like you do with alcohol, is that there isn’t enough alcohol in all the liquor stores in the world to fill up that thing,” he said. “And, in Jennifer’s case, I don’t think there’s enough followers or movies or records or any of that stuff to still that part in you that still feels a longing and pain. Ultimately, that’s the work you gotta do on your own.”
Lopez described her mom as a “narcissist center of attention, life of the party-type person” and said she became used to surrounding herself with people like that. (Emma McIntyre/Getty Images for Global Citizen VAX LIVE)
Self-investment
Lopez’s decision to create the music film to go with her new album was met with some surprise from people.
She acknowledged that the album, her first in years, isn’t something anyone is “clamoring for,” adding, “I don’t need to do this, but I want to.”
At one point, an unspecified financial backer drops out of the film, shocking Lopez, who noted she’s never had a deal yanked away like that.
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Variety reported that Lopez has earned more than $1 billion at the box office for just her rom-coms, and boasts 17.5 million TikTok followers and 250 million Instagram followers.
The frustration leads her to say “Oh s—, who’s paying for this? I guess me.”
Affleck notes “making a movie with your own money is the most famous cardinal sin in Hollywood,” but Lopez decides to proceed anyway.
Amazon ended up buying the film for an undisclosed amount.
Lopez ended up financing her music film, “This is Me…Now: A Love Story,” on her own after an unknown backer dropped out. (Michael Buckner/Variety via Getty Images)
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Famous no-shows
Lopez pitched her musical film idea to multiple celebrities to cast them in various parts.
Some big names end up turning her down, like Taylor Swift.
Jason Momoa, Jennifer Coolidge, Lizzo, Vanessa Hudgens, Ariana Grande and Snoop Dogg were unavailable to appear.
Lopez told her manager, Benny Medina, “Nobody wants to say no to me, Benny. I get that. But when an actor doesn’t like a script, doesn’t think it’s good enough or is worried about it, that’s what they’ll say.”
Taylor Swift was one of several big names who either said no or were unavailable for Lopez’s project. (Lionel Hahn/Getty)
One person who turned her down was “In the Heights” star Anthony Ramos, in part because of his friendship with Lopez’s ex-husband and father to her kids, Marc Anthony.
“I didn’t know that you and Marc were, like, good friends. I didn’t know that. That’s nice,” she says. “He’s the father of my kids, obviously. I’m never going to do anything that’s going to really pinpoint him out.”
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The scene she originally wanted him for was titled “Rebound,” and featured Lopez in an abusive relationship with a partner.
She also notes that the scene is not about any one partner in particular and is more about “the 20-year journey between that last album and this album.
Lopez ultimately secured big names like Jane Fonda and Sofia Vergara and a cameo from Affleck. (Michael Buckner/WWD)
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“A lot of things happened. There were a lot of relationships that I was in. That thing that you’re playing in, it is representative of many relationships, not one specific relationship.”
There was no shortage of stars in the final cast, including Jane Fonda, Sofia Vergara, Keke Palmer, Post Malone and two cameos from Affleck.
“The Greatest Love Story Never Told” and “This is Me…Now: A Love Story” are both available on Amazon Prime, and the album, “This is Me…Now,” is available to stream and purchase.
